A commitment to bad jokes and time wasting.
We are a small team consisting of young professionals who have no real experience, but we’ll say we do to get the job.
We even included a cool photo below to show you that we are modern, and stylish. Also, we center aligned our text because we like symmetry, mainly because it’s a word that makes you sound smart when you say it loudly.
A passion for eating food in strange spaces
Our comprehensive suite of professional nutrition demolishing diets will quickly have you running for the bathroom. Beware.
Renovation and restoration
Once we visit you, you’ll need to renovate and restore the room.
Continuous Support
We are needy, and require continual support in the form of free food and beverages
App Access
We expect you to share all your streaming service passwords with us.
Consulting
No, we make the decisions, you listen.
Project Management
My favorite joke.
Architectural Solutions
Everyone knows architects aren’t real.
An array of resources
[Money, Food, Water, Hot Cheetos]
I hate French.
- It sounds like verbal diarrhea
- It makes you look pretentious while speaking it
- If it were a person, I would punch it in the face
Russian’s cool though
- Sounds like piece of heavy machinery
- Makes people fear you when you speak it
- Will be useful in most doomsday scenarios
“Quotes are for people who can’t speak for themselves.”
Me
In Debt College Student
Watch, Read, Listen – Unless your blind and deaf, in which case you can’t read this so I don’t feel bad for making fun of you. I hope you don’t know how to use accessibility tools…
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